My Media Message

Ertugrul   My Media Message

“Resurrection: Ertugrul,” also originally titled “Dirilis: Ertugrul,” is on Netflix. Filmed in the Turkish language with subtitles, it tells a historical rendering of feudal Turkey in the time of the Crusades. I’m not a scholar of Turkish history, but what I like about it is that it is not wretchedly sexualized, indecent, horrifically violent and depraved like “Game of Thrones,” which I discontinued after two seasons. I’d notice how disturbed, agitated, and unsettled I’d felt when watching G of T, but the twists in the tales tended to keep me curious until I just determined that it affected me, costing my peace, at the least.

The Turkish show, though not quite as twisted with multiple story threads, reveals a code of living that we don’t seem to have in many families and social institutions. It nicely demonstrates a life with religious values and customs which relate to Islam. For example, people ask permission to enter the homes of others. This was directly advised in the Qur’an.

“O you who have believed, let those whom your right hands possess and those who have not [yet] reached puberty among you ask permission of you [before entering] at three times: before the dawn prayer and when you put aside your clothing [for rest] at noon and after the night prayer. [These are] three times of privacy for you. There is no blame upon you nor upon them beyond these [periods], for they continually circulate among you – some of you, among others. Thus does Allah make clear to you the verses; and Allah is Knowing and Wise.
And when the children among you reach puberty, let them ask permission [at all times] as those before them have done. Thus does Allah make clear to you His verses; and Allah is Knowing and Wise.” – Quran 24:58-59

Another feature I noticed was the role of the bey’s (leader’s) wife, who wisely is the confidante and counsel to her husband. She has significant power and is intelligently aware, but her husband has the position of tribe leader. Other women too, are respected and use their voice in opinions and yet, they are protected, treasured, and valued for the work they do to contribute to the community. Coincidentally, it also features Cameron Diaz’s doppelganger!

Over my life, I have seen some changes in gender roles and in the lot given to American women; and while I do not advise to go back to 1950’s gender roles in the limits that women endured, I see an erosion of family values and vacuum in teaching good character and ethics. Many mothers are working so hard to provide for their families, that they have little time and energy left for personally guiding their kids and enjoying relationships with spouses and friends.

This brings me to another point about the impact of media.

While driving one of my sons (and his two cats) back to his apartment in the city, he shared an interesting perspective with me. He’d mentioned that it was considered “cool” to be rude and disrespectful to adults when he was a teen. Now he finds it incredible that I had the patience to endure his attitudes and antics.

Reflecting on the past, I do believe the Disney Channel, which we “cool” parents were held ransom to provide via cable TV, was culpable in the shift from what I’d modeled as a kid. My high level of TV consumption was certainly instructive.

As a youngster, I was influenced by reruns of “The Little Rascals”, as was my father. And I gleaned my perspectives of fathers from “Father Knows Best,” “The Lucy Show,” “The Dick Van Dyke Show,” “The Donna Reed Show,” “Bonanza,” “Mayberry RFD,” and “Leave It to Beaver.”

Other shows I enjoyed were “Dobie Gillis,” “Gilligan’s Island,” “Batman,” “Superman,” “Zorro,” “The Lone Ranger,” “The Beverly Hillbillies,” “The Honeymooners,” “Gidget,” “The Flying Nun,” and “I Dream of Jeannie.” My family watched “The Ed Sullivan Show” and “Lawrence Welk” for entertainment. These all bring happy memories to this day.

Then, as I went through my adolescence, I raced through chores to watch “The Brady Bunch,” “Bewitched,” “It Takes a Thief,” “Love American Style,” “Fantasy Island,” and “The Love Boat.” That correlated with the time when I found myself at odds with my parents, especially my mother who did not appreciate my subscription to Cosmopolitan magazine, with its cleavage teasing cover shots. And life was decidedly not so innocent, nor so happy.

Americans are not happy. Maybe it’s more than the unacceptable conduct and rhetoric of our president. I expect our leaders to exemplify the highest of virtues and to be examples of higher quality character. The media influences us in many ways, and the state of the nation may be a result of our poor choices, as I conclude from the outpouring of ignorance and hate in deeds and words. The resurrection of people with morally diseased hearts is apparent, and I thought the messages of brotherhood, liberation and the Age of Aquarius had taken root. The weeds of society are still among us, and they have nasty thorns.

Some people fail to realize that we are of different races, ethnicities, and cultures as a benefit to our humanity. Exploration of languages, cultures, handiwork, and cuisines is sustenance for our intellect, and I believe diversity in America is our strength. In these are clues for appreciation of our Creator.

“O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allah is Knowing and Acquainted.” –Quran 49:13

Knowing that we all bleed red, I find the current culture of rudeness unacceptable, and I call upon our schools, media, and parents to promote justice, manners, tolerance, industriousness, and civility. In short, let’s resurrect a conscious humanity, find our joie de vivre, and choose leaders who will work for the benefit of all citizens. We’ve been duped, sold out, but our system has the capacity to correct this mess. I’m counting on it.

But when people are too busy slaving to survive, the fox can get in the hen house. That’s where he is now and we should learn from this. Democracy needs whistleblowers and watch dogs, and this is where media can be a force for goodness and virtue. We just have to choose wisely so they get the message.

Ready, Set, Go!

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Ready, Set, Go!

Believe me, every day I blog….in my head, but never get to writing. With the end of Ramadan, my chance to regenerate, I need to charge ahead to something I’ve been eager to pursue—besides breakfast and coffee in daylight.

Ramadan commenced with a very different start than my norm. As our son was unable to take time off work to drive a 2007 powder blue Mustang he’d purchased from an auction through a relative in Phoenix, my husband and I flew one-way to make an epic trip back to Chicago. Also, a long-held dream was fulfilled when we visited a dear girlfriend I’ve known since 5th grade. We stopped by to see her briefly for lunch in Ruidoso, NM. Since we were traveling, we suspended our Ramadan fasting but plan to make up the days. Yet, these being the longest days of the year, we’ll defer them until shorter, cooler days reappear. In Chicago, that should be in about two months.

Naturally, since I live in “flatland,” I love mountains, dry heat, forests, and bodies of water. Everywhere I go, I try to envision if it could become “home,” but although I can get along well in many places, the decision always includes consideration of where my children could live and work. Also, I reminded myself today that as Ramadan invariably puts athletic activities into dormancy, I value having decent biking trails and cheap golf nearby. It was great to pedal over to the library to pick up a book on negotiation skills today. And as we’ve not golfed in a very long time, and only visited the golf range once this year, it’s time to schedule some outings because there are only four months left to the season.

Yet, as Ramadan has multiple spiritual and physical benefits of bringing one closer to the Creator, improving the body’s metabolic efficiency, and vastly increasing socializing through multiple iftars (dinner invitations), it causes one to pause and prioritize how one wishes to become better and more on course with the vision of one’s life. Think of it as a time to make resolutions.

Typically, I would sleep after the dawn; many nights I’d be re-evaluating my choices and mapping new possibilities. Now, transitioning back to daytime work hours, coffee, and focus-enabling hydration, I’m juggling what Curly from City Slickers said, “…just one thing.” I’m READY to commit, SET with a plan, and it’s time to GO!

Somewhere in Nowhere

Somewhere in Nowhere Kentucky

It’s been a rough few weeks whereby I’d travelled to Maryland, New Jersey, and Kentucky. Then presented at the ISNA Education Forum and International Nanny Association conference, attended and wrote about the IFANCA conference and Pakistan’s Halal accreditation progress (those were positive experiences), but also suffered the loss of one of my brothers-in-law, and the near fatal infection that necessitated my son’s fiancée to be in the ICU at Loyola Medical Center for nearly two weeks. With my husband overseas for his sibling’s funeral and mourning, the rest of us stayed at the ICU with the family of our son’s fiancée until her release to home a couple days ago.

It was a lot of life, death, and near death to deal with, and at times all I could do was remember what my mother once told me. “There will come a time when you will need your religion.” My family has just endured one of those times when even though you muster all you can to battle against threats, fear, and fatigue, ultimately you realize that you can only rely on God’s mercy to make it all right. And thankfully, it will be again.

But the design of the events, the coincidences and timings, could hardly have been accidental. For when I study how benefits were oddly derived, albeit through suffering loss and the threat of loss, do I find myself amazed. For out of the metaphorical ashes do I perceive bonds forged, appreciation for what is essential, and a determination to hold tightly to what gifts I have been given from above.

There is also the reminder to live for now and avoid putting off enjoyment of what life can offer before I cannot see, travel, and do. For one never knows when one may be somewhere in nowhere again.

The Future of Education Includes Self-Care

Education is what other people do to you. Learning is what you do to yourself.” (p. 167).

The future of education must address the unmet needs of companies who seek employees with both math and social skills, and the struggle of teachers to care for their selves.

Responding to educators’ needs in juggling their students’ job market preparation and their own self-care, I will be presenting at the upcoming ISNA Education Forum.

Based on books and articles, and apps I have used, my session is backed by research and my own experiences. As an experienced educator and administrator in a parochial school, I know the struggle between keeping tuition rates low, to accommodate middle and lower socioeconomic families, and teachers not being able to afford healthcare, domestic help, and niceties like new clothes, shoes, restaurants, and vacations, unless their salaries are supplemented with additional income. It is also a problem when teachers and administrators give many years of service to their community and then have no capitalization for retirement. That is why it is imperative to invest in self-care.

Exploring the topic from spiritual, physical, intellectual, and emotional perspectives, we will examine priorities and craft a plan to realize that as givers, we have to give ourselves permission to be responsible and designate our boundaries in the interest of self-preservation.

My business has opened new glimpses into what education, optimized entrepreneurship, and investment opportunities will be in the future, and it is only beginning.

That is why we will explore how teachers can start a paradigm shift to meet that future in a wholistic capacity to serve while not depleting themselves in the process.

“Education is what other people do to you. Learning is what you do to yourself.” –From Whiplash: How to survive our faster future by Joi Ito (MIT Lab) and Jeff Howe

March On, March

credit-flickr-wm-horsburgh March On, March

“It’s a good day.” “I’m on this side of the grass.” That’s what Dad would say, even though the grass is more like a soggy brown mat with snow flurries presently gracing it. I miss my father, and it is the month he died two years ago.
While I try to stay positive, in what characteristically has been my least favored month, I’m pleased to see the return of the daffodils at Trader Joe’s. To me, that is one of the hallmarks of springtime coming soon.
This year has been largely void of the usual amount of snow, and wouldn’t you know it was the year we finally acquired a snow blower. Joke’s on us! With a very long driveway, I will keep it ready to blow until mid-April, because snow blizzards have still been known to dump on us then.
Various work projects get me through this arduous season, as I develop creative presentations using new audio and visual technologies for myself and my clients. Along with some writing and editing, I have a healthy balance of interesting prospects to carry me toward May, for which I am grateful.
My take on the current political situation is best illustrated by my husband’s experience today. About a month ago, we were invited to meet our son’s fiancee’s family at her graduation party. We were in our car, standing still at the entry to a small cul-de-sac, looking for a place to park, when another car reversed out of a driveway and collided with our rear panel. Fortunately, no one was injured, and we felt pity for the young driver. Wanting to help him, we’d suggested that we’d settle without police or insurance company intervention. But the boy’s uncle, who owned the home and who did not witness the accident, insisted that we call the police, so I did. The result was that the officer saw the evidence and issued the young man a citation. (Lesson: don’t always listen to your old uncle.)
As expected, the other insurance company sent us a check for damages, but then a court summons arrived in the mail for my husband’s appearance today. Not going to work was a burden, but it seemed that the young man took the advice of his uncle and wanted his day in court.
The judge asked him, “How do you plea?” The young man replied, “Wait!” “I want to tell you what happened.” His Honor stated, “No, you don’t.” “How do you plea?” “Guilty or not guilty?”
Not only did he have to pay the ticket, he also earned court fees. The judge profusely thanked my husband for his attendance and the case was closed.
I hope the young man learned what I want everyone to remember. We have systems. They guide and preserve us, and I am ever more pleased that Americans are once again taking an interest in their civic duties.
Ignorance, hubris, and apathy are the enemies. As long as we don’t indulge them, we will march on. March on, March!

Operation SPS: Squatty Potty Strategy

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Credit Source: Lybio.net

Mission SPS: Squatty Potty™ Strategy
There was something oddly familiar about the gift I received from my sister this past Christmas. A Squatty Potty™, which is normally not something I would advertise; but in the current political clime, it seems selfish to not share my own self-care strategy.
Its familiarity resonated from the cute instructional video (you have to click on the link) about its proper use and scientifically supported value. Curiously, I suspected that My Little Pony’s™ Rainbow Dash was moonlighting, with the addition of a horn, to be the Squatty Potty™ mascot, a unicorn that can poo rainbow…, well you know.
While we in the Modern Age can add a device like the Squatty Potty™ to our bathrooms, it is amusing to cite another reason it was comfortingly familiar. This invention corrects the body’s anatomical stance when on a toilet, so that it can return to its evolutionary baseline, a squat. Ironically, before plumbing, humans were meant to squat over the earth, but in many countries this is the exact position one assumes when using a “traditional” toilet.
Funny how we forget that long established traditional cultures have ancient knowledge worthy of respect and study.
I believe that every American should have the good fortune to see other countries in the world—and not just on the tourist track—they should see and experience for a spell how people really live.
It has been one of my highest priorities as a parent to encourage this for my own children, and I believe it gives them true vision of the world outside the U.S.
Yet, why do I share this as critical self-care? Many people I have spoken with have expressed deep disturbance and anxiety over the social climate in the U.S. The barrage of articles, videos, protests, and interviews had resulted in one relative commenting that she wanted to vomit when she saw the current Counselor to the President of Donald Trump; and I’d noted several nights of restless sleep, which when analyzed were blamed on visions of an orange puss-faced character who made a lot of senseless noise.
Therefore, I credit my Squatty Potty™ with getting “it all out;” and with the benefit of lavender essential oil in an aromatherapy mister, as well as my discover of a “Name That Tune” type of game app called SongPop 2, and lastly a bedtime dose of magnesium citrate; now I sleep very well.
This is a long term strategy for self-preservation and wellness. Feel free to share how you are strategizing to keep health and stress in check in these days of chaos. Peace.

Recipe for Leadership and Economic Success

fullsizerender Half of America is stunned by results of the 2016 presidential election, and it is disturbing to see such deep emotional responses ranging from blatant uncivil conduct to outright depression and fear.

Smoldering xenophobia and racism has been uncovered, and it is reminiscent of bad days I’d thought passed from the black-and-white TV news clips seen when I was a child in the 60s. What folly based in ethnocentric myopia! It is especially surprising in an age in increased connectivity and access to global communities.

Trump has stirred up and re-ignited embers not yet extinguished, but it was fueled by a void in leadership and economic stresses exacerbated by our fiat currency. A bipartisan stalemate, political representatives and media bought by special interests, and economic hardship for most Americans has created this dilemma.

The two majority parties, who should have selected better candidates, obviously chose their presidential nominees because they wanted to secure their futures with more of the same. Meanwhile, a vast number of folks representing both sides directly sought change for the betterment of the country, but we will see what change we will get now.

Trump, although given the opportunity, has ironically chosen to be silent now on the civil unrest he seemed to imply was acceptable by his own unpresidential conduct. He promised solutions, and we will see if he has the capacity to play politics as well as he played the people.

However, I am pleased that the Obama administration respected the will of the people and legal treaty to support the stay at Standing Rock. Also, in eight years, the sky did not fall in from the economic plight left by both the Bush and Clinton administrations, but I don’t believe the numbers that imply that we are really better off now.

Compared to the global growth in economies, America is still not showing enough real traction to overcome its debt burdens. These were created by a few malevolent players that dominate finance, pharmaceutical, insurance, petroleum, and weapons industries.

Historically, war has been used to create economic growth and wealth for the few at the expense of human suffering and lives. Let’s not fall into the traps that are set by these parasites. Let’s not capitulate to hate and fear, which are deliberately being provoked to justify the next agenda of the ultra-elitist manipulators.

I’m touched to see communities reaching out and people talking to each other so that those hateful and ignorant embers do indeed die and we can progress in solid unity, as our country was conceived to be. We educators need to give a global perspective to our students and encourage the study of foreign cultures and languages. We, as Americans, need to travel and see more of the world in order to understand that we as humanity share the earth and its resources. Only then can we collaborate to find solutions for global sustainability and secure a free America.

Entrepreneurship, creating value and jobs through the production of goods and services, is an area familiar to Trump. I hope he will greatly use that avenue to make America great again. Meanwhile, he could do more to heal wounds that need mending so that his four years have a chance for a favorable legacy.